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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27090511">Of Agony and Ardor</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/amandaterasu/pseuds/amandaterasu'>amandaterasu</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alpha Seteth (Fire Emblem), Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Background Relationships, Breeding, Canonical Character Death, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Knotting, Love after Loss, Omega Flayn, Omega My Unit | Byleth, Overprotective, Pining, Religious Guilt, Religious Imagery &amp; Symbolism, Retelling, Tags May Change, helicopter parent, survivor's guilt</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-09 03:07:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,232</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27090511</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/amandaterasu/pseuds/amandaterasu</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Seteth had thought his Alpha urges dead after centuries without being around an Omega other than Flayn. He quickly comes to realize that was not the case when he meets Byleth, the only human Omega he has ever met.</p><p>This is a retelling of Fire Emblem: Three Houses from the point of view of Seteth, and an ABO fic. I'll be weaving in things from all three routes, though the initial frame of the fic will be Azure Moon, it will continue past the end of that route and have events from the others. Assume massive spoilers for everything FE3H.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>My Unit | Byleth/Seteth</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>53</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Of Agony and Ardor</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Aaah. Please be gentle with me. I've been working on this fic for some time in outlines, and updates will probably be slow as I'm planning to make each "chapter" of the game into its own "chapter" of the fic. Ergo some will be long and others short.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The nightmare was almost comforting in its familiarity.</p><p>Even though he knew he was dreaming, already knew what he would find, he still raced across the battlefield, past the bodies of his friends and compatriots. He ran until his breath came from him in ragged gasps, his lungs burning for air, still screaming one name, the only name he had cried out that day well over a dozen lifetimes ago.</p><p>
  <i>"Cethleann!"</i>
</p><p>Sometimes, in the centuries since, he had wondered if Sothis had heard that desperate prayer, and that was how she had chosen who would survive. He wondered if he had called for his wife instead, if she would be the one he had found alive. Traitorous thoughts, those were, and ones that only plagued him when his loneliness grew sharp. Still, he knew he had made the right choice; it was the only choice a father could make.</p><p>Cichol found them in the same place they always had been, his wife's corpse thrown over his daughter's unconscious body. In the years immediately after, he had often felt the rage and terror near consume him in the dream, just as they had when he'd been forced to live these moments in the waking world. But now the primal scream that tore from his throat was an echo that did not reach his soul. Time had granted him emotional distance; it had shut down the Alpha instincts that had sent him into a near frenzy at his failure to protect the two most precious people given into his care. Now he felt little other than hot shame at such casual disregard for the dead as his dreaming self tossed aside his wife's body unceremoniously to reach his precious daughter.</p><p>Cethleann's wound had been ghastly, and seeing it again like this made him flinch internally, even though he knew things would be all right. She had needed time, time he had given her through careful hiding and planning, and his daughter was well and whole again, locked safely inside the fortress that was Garreg Mach.</p><p>Still, the Cichol in the dream reached down and touched the gash in her abdomen. His hands trembled as they came away stained green.</p><p>The Monastery Bell chiming the hour pulled Seteth from his sleep, thankfully, sparing him the rest of the nightmare. He allowed himself a few moments to let the emotions subside and draw comfort from the sounds of Flayn climbing out of bed in the next room. It reminded him the worst had passed and he got out of bed himself and washed his face and hands in the basin.</p>
<hr/><p>"A new school year is upon us," Rhea said, smiling beatifically at the assembled faculty and staff. "And the Goddess has blessed us with all three of the future leaders of the nations of Fódlan. I know none of you will shirk your responsibilities to our students, but this year it is especially important that we keep the Goddess's teachings close to our hearts."</p><p>Seteth glanced around the room at the assemblage. The Knights of Sothis, of course, listened to the Archbishop in rapt attention, as did Hanneman. Manuela was a lost cause, more focused on the new Professor, Landrill. The man was young (though not so young as Jeritza), and the fourth son of a minor noble house in the Leicester Alliance. </p><p>Rhea had felt it important to make sure the third professor, at least, was not Adrestian. Though Hanneman had long ago forsworn his noble heritage, he was still an Adrestian citizen, as was Manuela. It amused Seteth to think that a few short centuries ago, they <i>all</i> would have been, but the Archbishop playing politics had divided the land into three nations that required representation. </p><p>Landrill's recommendations had been perfect; his father and a few of his father's allies had sent glowing letters full of praise for his skill on the training ground. The problem, in Seteth's view, was the boy <i>only</i> experienced on the training ground. He would have to fix that, and quickly, before taking responsibility for one of the three houses of students.</p><p>"Professor Landrill," Seteth said as soon as Rhea was finished with her prayers and platitudes. "I will need to speak with you in my office, you as well, Alois."</p><p>Alois grinned and pumped his fist. "You have work for us already! Starting off the school year right, I see!"</p><p>Landrill glanced between the two of them and nodded, mutely. While Seteth was glad the man seemed to lack the Knight's overabundance of enthusiasm, he did think a bit more courage would not go amiss, considering the man would be dealing with headstrong students and taking them onto the field of battle.</p><p>Turning to Seteth, Rhea reached out and placed a hand on his as soon as the others had vacated. "How are you feeling, my friend?"</p><p>He sighed. "As well as can be expected. Old nightmares come to call, but it's been over a thousand years since I felt any pain beyond the emotional." It wasn't a lie. The only True Omega left was Flayn, and she was his kin - thus his Alpha nature did not rear its head beyond a desire to protect her. All the other parts of himself that had been so vibrant during the war: the passion, the <i>hunger,</i> the rage; they had all been silenced, one by one, over the centuries of his solitude. </p><p>In the immediate aftermath of his wife's death, he had been near insensate with the destructive fury that only came on an Alpha when someone harmed their Omega. The only thing that warred against it and stayed his hand - the only thing that had given Rhea the space to form the Church of Seiros when he wanted to render all of Fódlan to ash - had been the conflicting instinct to stay and guard Flayn despite his great desire for revenge.</p><p>Seteth didn't stay to listen to the Archbishop's platitudes. Instead, he picked up his papers and headed to his office where Alois and Landrill waited for him. The acting Captain of the Knights saluted briskly. "So, Seteth, what business do you have for the new professor and I?"</p><p>Now in close proximity, and away from the larger press of the monastery's regulars, he allowed himself to take Landrill's measure more closely. "Boy" was the only appropriate term <i>for</i> him - though he had maybe three years on Jeritza, he lacked the man's self-assurance and combat skill. Even worse, Seteth caught the subtle faint scent of an Omega swirling about the man. </p><p>"You have a crest," he said, abruptly. It wasn't strong - it never was in humans - but he could sense it still, like the echo of a single measure of a song from his childhood. A reference to a memory, some tentative connection to whichever Nabatean his ancestor had murdered. It was not enough to set his teeth on edge or make him hunger, thank Sothis. Just a constant, nagging reminder of what had happened to his people - of everything that had been lost.</p><p>Landrill, of course, had no idea, and bowed politely. "Yes. My family is a cadet branch of House Goneril. I was lucky enough to be born with it."</p><p>"I see," Seteth glanced at Alois, then back. "And am I correct in assuming you have no <i>actual</i> combat experience?"</p><p>The man was good enough to wince. "I am afraid so. I am, however, extremely skilled, as my letters of recommendation will sho-"</p><p>"I've read them," Seteth said. "I do not fault you for not having experience up until now, but the fact of the matter remains that as a professor at this academy, you will be leading your house in actual skirmishes, dealing with bandits and the like." </p><p>"I am prepared to do my duty, sir," Landrill said, and Seteth almost smirked at the Omega deference coming to the fore.</p><p>"We'll see. I have a task for you, that Alois will and some of the knights will assist with: I'd like you to take our new House Leaders - Princess Edelgard, Prince Dimitri, and Claude of House Riegan - and deal with a group of bandits that have been harassing merchants travelling to and from the monastery." He reached across his desk and picked up a bundle of papers, offering them to Landrill. "These are the reports we've received on their whereabouts and activities. I trust you are capable of handling this?"</p><p>Sweat beaded on Landrill's forehead. "Of course," he bluffed. "I'll just go… prepare myself."</p><p>"I'll send Alois to fetch you once the students are prepared," Seteth offered blandly as he darted out the door.</p><p>"I wonder what has him so bothered," Alois asked, watching Landrill flee.</p><p>"I'm sure our new professor just has a nervous disposition," Seteth said, taking a seat at his desk and going over the other documents he'd left out to examine that morning. "I trust everything is in order with regards to managing the Knights' affairs while the Captain is indisposed?"</p><p>Alois laughed. "As well as it can be. I feel woefully underqualified for the position."</p><p>"The Archbishop and I have every faith in you and your abilities. I'm sure once you…" His voice trailed off as he glanced up to see Flayn's figure in the doorway.</p><p>"I'm sorry, brother, am I interrupting?" she asked.</p><p>"Not at all, Flayn. Please, come in." He turned his attention back to Alois. "Is there anything I can do to make the work less daunting?"</p><p>Alois grinned. "I'm sure I'll manage." He offered Flayn a half-bow before heading out, leaving the two of them alone. Seeing the opportunity, she closed the office door.</p><p>"What is it? Is something wrong?" </p><p>Flayn stood before his desk. "That depends on you, dear brother," she said, then swallowed her nerves. "I would like your permission to enroll in the Academy as a student this year."</p><p>Seteth snorted. "Absolutely not."</p><p>"And why not?" she scowled at him. "I am more than capable. I <i>aced</i> the entrance exams!"</p><p>"It is not safe," Seteth chided. "And it is unfair of you to put yourself in situations you are not equipped to handle."</p><p>"Not equipped to handle? I've seen more of war than anyone in Garreg Mach save you and Rhea."</p><p>"Yes," he agreed, "and you remember what that cost us." She looked down at her feet, cowed to silence, and he sighed. "I understand you wish to interact more with your peers, but the fact of the matter is that you <i>have</i> none. You are an Omega, Flayn. I made the mistake before of letting you and your mother take the field, and as punishment for neglecting my duty, I nearly lost you both. I will spend the rest of my life alone because I failed to protect you." He swallowed. "I will not make that mistake again. When you're a little older, maybe, but -"</p><p>"I am far older than the students, and -"</p><p>"- and <i>none</i> of those students are Omegas," he countered. "It is no fault of yours, Flayn, and I beg you not to punish yourself for it. It is not good for you to do something so counter to your nature. Even back then, you were a healer, not a warrior. Omegas do not make good warriors, and that is all right. We all have roles to which we are predisposed, and being a military officer is not one for you."</p><p>"And you will not be swayed on this, will you?" </p><p>"No, I'm sorry, Flayn."</p><p>She sighed. "Fine. I will leave you to do your work."</p><p>He could sense the frustration and disappointment in her voice. "Perhaps we could take a day trip into the market later this month? I'm sure you have some things you'd like to pick up?"</p><p>Flayn said nothing, just opened the door and walked away, leaving Seteth to rub his forehead in irritation and confusion at why he could not seem to make her happy.</p><p>That night, as Seteth prepared for bed, he heard Flayn in the next room praying. Such things were private, and normally he would leave her to them, but if there was any way he could help her be happier while keeping her safe, he felt obligated to take it.</p><p>He carefully lifted a glass from his nightstand and crept out into the hall, pressing the glass against her door, and his ear against the glass to amplify what she said. To his surprise, she prayed not for the fripperies of childhood, or the romances common to the young, but for <i>him.</i></p><p>"Goddess, I wanted to be there," Flayn said. "I knew what the risks were. I accepted them. So did Mother. Please, help my father move on. Either send someone to ease his loneliness, or dull the edge of it! I think he -"</p><p>Seteth pulled the glass from the door and walked away. Her prayers were private and should remain so. As it was, he needed to get some sleep, if only so he could have that nightmare once again.</p>
<hr/><p>"And I would like to increase the funds we are setting aside for the Millenium Festival," Rhea said as she and Seteth viewed the reflecting pools near her chambers. "It is my fervent wish that it be a time of great rejoicing for all of the faithful. Anything we can spare now will only increase our joy then."</p><p>"Of course, Archbishop," he said, making a note of it while she pondered. "Tomas has asked for an additional monk to be assigned to the library, as he is starting to have trouble getting around."</p><p>"He served the Goddess faithfully for decades, let him have whatever he requires." </p><p>Seteth was unsure if her comment was supposed to be a slight or not. He knew, to some extent, Rhea begrudged him he and Flayn's absence after the Battle of Tailtean. He had only returned to her side after being specifically <i>summoned</i> eighteen years ago, and had only allowed Flayn to join them last year - that more because he hoped Rhea's companionship would ease her loneliness and her desire to go out into the wider world. Still, even if it was a slight, he would not acknowledge it; he made note to give Tomas the monk and moved on to the next item on the list.</p><p>The sound of an armored man rushing up the stone steps killed their conversation, and both Rhea and Seteth turned to see Alois leaning on the wall, breathing heavily. "Not as young as I used to be!" he joked, then stood up straight and approached. "Archbishop, I have fantastic news."</p><p>Rhea smiled patiently. "Please, Alois, tell us."</p><p>"Jeralt has returned."</p><p>The name meant nothing to Seteth, but Rhea's eyes widened and she took a step toward Alois. "Truly?"</p><p>"Yes," Alois began. "After routing the bandits I -"</p><p>"Wait," Seteth interrupted. "I haven't had your report on that. How did Landrill do? Are the students unharmed?" His hair was going to go white if anything had happened to their House Leaders.</p><p>Alois laughed. "Oh, you'll need to find a new professor - the moment he realized the bandits would actually try to kill him, Landrill bolted. Haven't seen him since. Then the students chased after the bandits, and I chased after them. To my surprise, they had stumbled upon a local mercenary company, and enlisted their aid. A mercenary company <i>led</i> by Jeralt, the Blade Breaker."</p><p>"Wait…" Seteth said, racking his brain. "Isn't that the man who died in the fire, a few years before I arrived?"</p><p>"Yes!" Alois said. "We thought he had perished, but he was there, with his daughter, no less."</p><p>"Daughter?" Rhea's voice was breathy and hopeful, and her hands shook. "His daughter was with him?"</p><p>Seemingly unaware of Rhea's change in demeanor, Alois nodded. "Yes she was - she even saved Princess Edelgard's life! If you don't mind me saying so, I think she'd be an excellent replacement for Landrill, and Jeralt can take up a position with the knights again!"</p><p>"Now just a moment, we can't just make a random woman a <i>profe-"</i></p><p>"Yes," Rhea said. "She will do excellently in the position. Seteth, I will receive them immediately in the audience chamber. Can you go ensure the necessary preparations are made?" She turned away without waiting for a response, and Seteth gave a frustrated sigh.</p><p>As he headed towards the stairs he heard her murmur, "I wonder… did the flow of time bring you here?" and something in the air set Seteth ill at ease - but he had long since given up questioning Rhea.</p>
<hr/><p>Fifteen minutes later, Seteth waited at the foot of the stairs after Alois had shown Jeralt and his daughter to the audience chamber. When Rhea arrived, her shell shocked expression had at last vanished, to be replaced by the distant kindness that was the veneer of the Archbishop. They walked together in silence toward the double doors, but just before he touched the handle, Rhea said, "Wait."</p><p>Seteth glanced over his shoulder at her, lifting an eyebrow but saying nothing; he merely waited for her explanation. The Archbishop took a moment and inhaled, letting her eyes flutter shut. Like most of their people had been, she was a Beta, and untouched by the more intense instincts of the other kinds of Nabateans but he wondered - especially now, when he saw her so discomfited but eager - if her life without such driving passions was similar to what his had become. </p><p>"If this is the meeting I think it is," Rhea whispered, "then this is a most joyous day for the Church." She squeezed her hands together tightly before her, and released them. "Whatever we find on the other side of that door, we will do what we must - for Sothis."</p><p>"Of course, Rhea," he said absently, and pushed open the door.</p><p>Once, while Flayn slumbered, Seteth had gone to Ailell and allowed himself to be nothing but a manifestation of the Goddess's rage for a few decades, little more than the beast he could become as he worked through his grief and loss by harrying human travellers who dared across the valley. That entire time was nothing in his memory but a smear of heat and an endless, unquenchable thirst. That first drink he had afterward, when he had returned to the crypt in which he had hidden Flayn and drank deeply of the sweet water from a nearby stream, had awakened him from that anger, and returned to him some part of who he was. But it was nothing compared to this moment, when he opened the doors and caught the scent of Jeralt's daughter.</p><p>The girl was obviously human - her rounded ears were quite visible, and her hair and eyes were not green - but the air around her seemed to hum for Seteth with all the coiled tension of an unplucked harp string; and he realized he had been wound far too tight.</p><p>It was a trap; it had to be. The remaining Nabateans were so few in number. If there had been another Omega than Flayn these past centuries he would have found them. To suddenly find one now, <i>here</i> of all places? Walking in the front door of the monastery and presenting herself to him?</p><p>The part of him that was Seteth tried so desperately hard to stop it, but for the first time in centuries Cichol woke up.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>If you like my writing and want to know when this fic and others update check out my twitter: <a href="https://www.twitter.com/amandaterasu">@amandaterasu</a>!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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